So first, you unzip your trousers…hmmm, let me begin again. For anatomical and societal reasons, women don’t have ready access to the men’s restroom. That creates a big hassle with long lines during concert intermissions. It’s also a business problem. A lot goes on in men’s restrooms that we’re not a part of. I’ve been ambushed plenty of times by the phenomenon of the restroom “pre-meeting”. We get in a conference room to discuss the agenda, and the outcomes have already been decided. How did this happen? It happened because the guys took a bathroom break prior to our meeting, discussed the upcoming meeting issues, strolled in and had all the answers before I could even form a sentence.

While men can have their meetings in the restroom, on the golf course, at the sports bar and other male-dominated social settings, women have more limited ways to build the influence that lays a foundation to ask for needed resources such as capital, compensation, plum assignments, and promotions. But the simple truth is this: to advance in our companies we have to figure this out.

One very effective way to do this is to take the time to build trust in our organizations. When we’re asked to be on a task force or a cross-functional team, we don’t have a home playing field advantage. These folks are often new to us, not on our team day in and day out. Take advantage of this new opportunity. Be sure that before the assignment is over, you’ve reached out to at least one person who was new to you. Ask for a breakfast or a lunch. Seek their input on a project they can help with. Stay in contact.

We like to get to the period quickly because we’re so blasted efficient about what we do. It takes time to build relationships. Don’t skimp here. It’ll pay dividends down the road, and who knows, you may just make a cherished new friend.
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